Menachem Bluming Muses: Help! I Sat at the Table Corner, will I ever Get Married?!

In many families, it is strictly forbidden for any unmarried person to sit at the corner of the table. Many were told from a young age that if you do sit at a corner, you will never get married. Have you ever heard of this? Is this a Jewish belief?

This belief is widely held, and has been handed down for generations in a range of cultures. If your grandmother is Polish, Russian, Hungarian, Romanian or Ukrainian then there is a good chance she grew up with this superstition. The fact that many Jewish families originate from those countries may explain why so many share this belief. But it doesn’t come from a Jewish source.

Judaism forbids the adoption of beliefs and practices that are not sourced in our own tradition, unless they have a logical reason behind them. So if a black cat passes in front of you, we don’t believe that means you will have bad luck. But walking under a ladder may bring bad luck, if someone falls on you.

So avoiding ladders makes sense, avoiding black cats doesn’t. What about table corners?

An intensive statistical study into the single status of corner sitters has yet to produce any conclusive results 🙂 But using logic alone, one could argue that sitting at a corner may actually make you more marriageable, not less. It depends on your motive.

If the table is crowded, and you choose the corner spot to make more room at the table for others to sit, then you are a great candidate for marriage. Making space for another is the first step in any relationship.

On the other hand, if you sit there because you can’t make up your mind which side to sit on, then perhaps this indicates an indecisive personality. Someone who finds it hard to take a position on anything, who is never here nor there but lost in between, might have a harder time committing to a relationship. That is a corner you don’t want to get stuck at.

May all those seeking their intended one find him/ her easily!

Rabbi Mendel (Menachem) Bluming and Rabbi Moss

Should Kippahs be removed in public to protect safety?

Menachem Bluming Muses:

Lately, some are cautioning against wearing a Kippah publicly due to mounting Anti Semitism. Should Kippahs be removed in public to protect safety?

Here’s a thought:

There are two ways to wear a kippah. You can wear it on your head, or you can wear it in your head.

Wearing a kippah on your head means it is an article of clothing, an accessory, an external addition to your self.

Wearing it in your head means it is part of you, it is a fixture, a piece of your very self. It is not just what you wear, it is who you are.

If your kippah is on your head, you can take it off. If it’s in your head, then you can never remove it. It is you. And you can’t stop being you, even if others don’t like it.

We need to take every precaution to ensure our safety. Take a course in martial arts, go out in groups. But we can’t stop being who we are. Once we retreat from our own identity, we are already a victim, even if no one tries to harm us.

Learn self-defense. But never forget who that self is that you are defending. It is a head with a kippah.

Credits: Rabbi Moss and Mendel (Menachem) Bluming of Potomac, Maryland